Hooray! February is almost over

The title says it all. You know for February being such a short month, it has not done well by me at the scales.

I guess I should always feel better when the scales show a loss rather than a gain. I am in charge of figuring out who has lost the most weight for the month in our group and I was sure it was going to be me. I was the best weekly loser for two weeks out of this past month, but I wasn't the best loser for the month.

I only lost 1 pound for the entire month. This is not a bad thing, I am seeing other differences; my clothes are fitting me better; and my overall attitude has improved. (I think) Last month I lost 13 pounds, so when I see that I only lost 1 pound for the month of February, well I am a little saddened by this. Not to fear, I will only look at this past month and see where I made mistakes and correct them.

I went out to eat more than I should have and I only got 4 days of exercise of 20 minutes or more for the day from February 1st until today. I know that a person of my size can lose weight without exercising, but I still like to eat and if I want to continue to eat then I need to exercise. I can't have it both ways.

I am going to kick it into high gear this week. My sister blew me out of the water this past week, she lost nearly 7 pounds for the week, while I maintained my present weight.

I love competition, so this has motivated me to fix what has not been working for me.

This week, I will make good choices, I will control my emotions and not let me emotions control me. My excess poundage IS there for all the world to see, but they are seeing forty pounds less of it:)

So, until next week, I hope to gain nothing but knowledge and lose nothing but weight.

160 Sticks of Butter

This week I would like to talk about visualization. To be able to visualize something is a wonderful thing. There is this picture of me with my sister that I am very pleased with. I was not at my thinnest by a long shot, but I thought I looked good and I was happy. I need to lose about 50 more pounds to look like that again, so this is my picture that I look at. Once I get there then I will concentrate on a different visual aid.

The other picture is what losing 26 pounds of butter would look like. This is 104 sticks of butter.

When you look at things in this perspective it has to look impressive. I have lost this many sticks of butter and then another 56 sticks.

This diet is still difficult at times, I would love to say that I have this mastered but I don't think I will ever truly have this mastered. I will always have an eating problem and right now it has it's ups and downs.

Obviously, this week is more of an up for me because I had a loss this week. I know I shouldn't be dependant on the scales as I am, and I think most people in my situation are in the same boat as I am.

Maybe as time goes on, I will be less dependant and my moods won't be tied so heavily to what the scales say.

As always, I am learning things about my self and usually in very small doses, but little steps means that the changes have a better shot of staying in place.

Week 19 is starting for me and I have lost 40 pounds in 18 weeks. That is simply amazing to me. I have never thought I could do this but here I am proving myself wrong.

So, until next time, I hope to lose nothing but weight and gain nothing but knowledge.

Times are feelin tough

Well, this has been a tough week for me. I don't know if it is the weather, or that I am sick as usual, or if I am a bit depressed, or that I am just an addict that is looking to blame my problems on someone other than me.

I am thinking that maybe all the above situations apply to me in some form or another. Have you heard the saying when it rains it pours? Well, of course we all have, and it has in my little neck of the woods.

I have been crazy busy with work all day and then I get home and take my son to driving school most evenings and then I pick him up. Last week the only time I spent at my house was to sleep. I have two weeks worth of laundry that I am slowly trying to catch up on, and my schedule is just as busy this week too. But wait, there's more. My son is sick, he has an infection that the doctor seems to think I passed on to him, and I have my infection that antibiotics isn't fighting.

So, this happens to the best of us, I know, but my eating habits is tied to my feelings and I am a food addict. That is just as bad as being into drugs or alcohol. Last week, I started making excuses as to why I shouldn't have to keep following the diet plan. I was blaming everyone else in my diet group for not following, so why should I?

Crazy, huh? I am the one that needs to lose MY weight and no one else can do it for me so whether they are doing something or not (and I don't really know if they are) should not hinder my progress.

Every once in awhile I get to feeling this way and all the things that are not good for me is what I want. This attitude is not just in my eating habits in is in every aspect of my life right now.

So while I am on here whining about my problems, all is not lost. I have a couple of friends who are talking to me to help me through this.

Thanks to them, I am slowly getting back on track, I am staying on my diet this week, but it is a chore. Sometimes, that is just the way it is.

So, progress report...I gained 1 1/2 pounds this week, not too bad considering what I am going through. Let's hope that next week I will be in a different frame of mind or this will be one pathetic blog for you all to read.

So until next time, I hope to gain nothing but knowledge and lose nothing but weight.

Can you guess the meaning of the picture?

Once again I have had a good week. I am beginning week 17 of my lifestyle change and it seems to be getting easier.

I have been thinking about what my present struggles are and I have two concerns.

The first one is my eating habits. While it seems I must be doing something right and yes, I am;

I am still having problems with overeating at times. Example 1 (and keep in mind it is usually on weekends) I went to dinner last Friday night and I was so hungry I could hardly see straight, I had planned on going out to dinner that wasn't my problem, the problem was the hunger. I had chips and salsa and when I go to dinner at this place, I can always control how much I eat, but I was shoveling in the chips and then when my dinner came, I ate all of it even though I was full from all the chips. I did not fare well that evening, I got sick and there was a waste of dinner. I did the same thing on Sunday, I ate too much. This time I ate until I was uncomfortable but not sick. I know that this is a problem and I have to change this. I am still trying to figure out how.

My second concern, is that I bought some new clothes and am buying them in smaller sizes even though I don't feel comfortable doing it. I cannot see myself any thinner, even though I can look at pictures and see it, I can't get it in my head that one day I will be wearing smaller clothes. I am down a size for the most part, I am sort of in that in-between stage, where the one size fits and is a little loose but the next size smaller while it fits, it is a little snug.

I wonder if I will ever see myself as thin. I have always been this size all my adult life and I still think of myself as being the weight I was when I started.

So, I have lost a total of 39 pounds. It has only been 16 weeks. I feel like in is in my grasp to get to the 50 pound mark by the end of February, but I will not put any undue stress on myself, it will happen, and it will happen soon.

So until next week...I hope to gain nothing but knowledge and lose nothing but weight.